Legitimate Rape = The Kind God Likes

Yesterday the Republican politician Richard Mourdock got real mad about them there uppity women wanting abortion rights and all. So he went on Facebook and wrote this:

Polical Spaghetti’s Pertinent Repost: Why Do Republicans Hate Sesame Street?

In 95, when they took over congress, the Republicans introduced a bill to drive a tank down Sesame Street and kill the fuck out of everyone from Big Bird to Elmo. Now, they are trying to do it again. So, why do Republicans hate Sesame Street so much?

Wingnuts Save the DNC From Nuking Itself

OK, I have finally returned from my weekish off where I took some time to listen to industrial music, read about theistic Satanism, and think about death. But now the folks at Before It’s News have deprived me of that sort of bliss by forcing me to write about their conspiracy theories about how Obammer tried to bomb the Democrats’ Convention but then AMERICA stopped him.

Stupid Republicans To Give Us All Their Money

Right Wing Watch has just been cold chillin’ at the Tea Party Unity Rally with a video camera, turning it on at random times to catch the totally insane stuff whoever happens to be speaking at the time bleats out. And now they caught some good news from the short wave ham radio operator Neal Boortz (Handle: Bald Eagle).

Ain’t No Party Like A Ron Paul Party ‘Cause A Ron Paul Party Has A Scientology Table

The Ron Paul people went and had their own counter-convention in Tampa this past weekend. Ron Paul didn’t show up. But the Church of Scientology did.

Glenn Beck Will Restore David Barton, For America and Stuff

Last week the Christian book publisher Thomas Nelson recalled David Barton’s book on Thomas Jefferson because there was just too much bullshit in it for them. That is saying a lot coming from a company that publishes books on Young Earth Creationism and some child’s NDE. Barton responded predictably, by inventing conspiracy theories of politically motivated historians who are all out to destroy him and cover up the troof. So Glenn Beck is now swooping in as David Barton’s white knight / vanity publisher.

Scott Brown Has Discovered the Communist (i.e. Pro-Voting) Conspiracy

When one of The Poors vote, Republicans have a sad.

The conspiracy started when Bill Clinton was sworn in as President in 1993. That same year, Congress passed the National Voter Registration Act of 1993, which required local and state governments to offer people a voter registration form when they renewed their driver’s license or applied for welfare. As a compromise to Republicans, it also required boring assholes to make exaggerated claims of inconvenience at the hands of the Department of Motor Vehicles, which is not nearly as terrible as said boring assholes would have you believe.

Republican Candidate Runs Campaign From Jail

Hey, if Eugene Debs can run a Presidential campaign from a jail cell where he was serving a term for violating the (pretty clearly unconstitutional) Conscription Act, then surely Fred E. Ray Smith can run for the Oklahoma State Senate from his jail cell where he’s doing time for being a deadbeat dad who drives around with an open container of alcohol, right?

Of course he can! And since he’s a Republican and this is Oklahoma, he will almost definitely still win. The best part is how his campaign manager / fiancé responded:

Scumbag Subreddit: r/ronpaul

I don’t hate all Libertarians. They get a few things right here and there. And it can be useful to talk politics with them one at a time. They’re like Pirahna: one is OK, but get a bunch of them together and it’s a nightmare. And if they start talking about the one true Lord and Savior Ron Paul then you’re best off just making your excuses and getting the hell out of there.

Vox Day Will Rate Your Blackness

Theodore Beale is this blogger at WorldNetDaily. He sometimes goes by Vox Day, probably because his family would disown him if they knew about his racism and misogyny and anti-science extremism. He’s also buddies with John Derbyshire – remember that NRO writer who got fired for writing that racist screed about how he tells his kids to stay away from black kids? And then everyone was like, “Oh, he’s just doing some stupid faux-colorblind tongue-in-cheek thing about how black people are the real racists for telling their kids about racism,” and he was like, “Nah, dude, I’m serious here.” Yeah, they’re tight.